Thursday, August 03, 2006

Sex with my male animal readers.

Bitchie Boy is a first-born bullock, grazing in a meadow. Suddenly I come up behind him and grab his meaty haunches. He stops chewing his cud, as a look of bewilderment spreads across his face.

This is the outer edge of sexual tension with my wife and livestock, 7 minuts at a time! Moooo!

Sunday, July 30, 2006

I'm Back!

I decided to start over again.

The truth is that I am a homosexual zoophile. This means that I like to have sex with animals of the same sex as me. I try to make it a point, however, only to have sex with kosher animals. This means that I can screw sheep and unblemished cows, but not pigs or starfish. Some locusts are okay.

The true reason for my wife's anger is that she knows I'm unfaithful to her with all of these animals. She's especially angry about a goat that I met on the Golan several weeks ago. That goat is so horny! Sometimes I last eight minutes. Or even 9!